The scene really hits home for a lot of guys,

The scene really hits home for a lot of guys, because it
gets down to a real-world situation that we all confront and
ponder.
I get lot of emails from guys asking me what to do in
this
very situation
The more I've thought about it, the more I realize that
this particular question (and the answer to it) are part of
a bigger, more important CONCEPT about how to deal with
women.
Let me explain.
When a guy asks me "How long should I wait to call her?"
this immediately tells me a few of things:
1. The guy doesn't feel like he's in control of the
situation. If he felt like he was in control, then it he
wouldn't ask, because it wouldn't matter.
2. The guy doesn't really "get" how male/female attraction
works. If he did get it, then he'd be thinking in those
terms rather than trying to figure out the exact best
amount of time to wait before calling.
To put it differently, the "when do I call her back?
problem is part of a bigger concept, and once you
understand that bigger concept better, then you'll have an
automatic feel for when to call a woman back.
Most guys don't "get" one simple point:
If you want a woman to feel ATTRACTION for you, then
you must behave differently than if you want her to feel
that "just friends" feeling.
In the world of ATTRACTION, things can be completely
different.
For instance, our moms taught all of us guys to "be
nice" to women. This usually includes being sweet and
complimentary when first meeting them, answering all of
their questions directly, and giving them what they
want when they want it.
But if you want a woman to feel that INSTANT GUT LEVEL
ATTRACTION right from the beginning, then you're going to
have to put aside this kind of thinking, and start
learning some NEW ideas.
For instance:
1. A challenge is generally attractive to women.
2. Teasing and being evasive is generally attractive to
women.
3. Making fun of a woman's appearance in a flirty way, as
counter-intuitive as it might sound, can lead to ATTRACTION.
I'm trying to communicate the idea that when you're
dealing with ATTRACTION, you have to put aside old "normal"
ways of thinking and behaving.
I would like to mention one more point before getting
into the specifics here...
These days, people are becoming very sensitive to having
"techniques" used on them.
If a salesman uses a sales technique on us, we
immediately
get defensive and resistant.
If a panhandler asks for money in a way that smells of
"technique" we pass them by without pity.
If a business treats us like a "thing" or a number
instead
of an individual person, we avoid them or buy elsewhere.
We humans don't like having manipulation techniques used
on us, and when we detect that someone or something is using
one to get the better of us, we resist.
So let's get back to the "how long to wait before calling
her back" issue.
If you think about it, every situation is slightly
different. One time you might meet a woman in the morning at
coffee, and another time you might meet a woman at a club at
1 in the morning.
If you wait too long to call her back, I think you run
the risk of seeming like you're just using a technique on
her, and you come across as a player who's trying to do your
thing on her.
When deciding how long to wait before you call or email,
I think it's important to ask yourself this question:
"What will be likely to INCREASE THE ATTRACTION in this
situation?"
Here are a couple of ideas I have used with great success:
1. Email instead of calling first. I personally email the
next day. I'll start with a charming email to get the
conversation started, then tell her that I'm going to call
in a day or two. This has the effect of making contact with
her relatively quickly, but still creating anticipation
because you haven't actually talked.
2. Call the next day, and make a joke about the situation. I
might call and say "Yea, I was watching Swingers and they
said to wait three days to call, but I was kind of in more
of a one day mood..."
If you didn't get her email address, and you MUST
use the phone, just do your best to avoid being AVERAGE.
I personally believe that our attention spans as humans
are getting shorter and shorter. We have more and more
information coming in from television, newspapers, and
other sources, and we're getting cultural ADD. I think that
if you wait too long, you're risking either being seen as
using a technique, or risking being forgotten altogether.
But if you make the opposite mistake and call too soon
(for instance a few hours later), you run the risk of being
seen as a needy wuss who has no life.
In a recent newsletter, I wrote about why it's important
to leave immediately after getting a woman's email and/or
number.
How long you should wait to call her back is a natural
extension of this.
As a matter of fact, if you get a woman's email/number
and then you keep coming over to talk to her, it can almost
be seen as waiting 5 minutes to call her.
There's no anticipation, and it says all the wrong
things.
A couple of other quick pointers for when you're making